This page is for you – for all the dads out there who’s wife has come to the decision that she wants a home birth. There is very little information that is meant for dad… yet he is the other half of the baby that is to be born.
I have no intention of trying to sway you one way or another, but I do as a wife and mother ask that you take the time that your wife has to learn and research for yourself. This time in a woman’s life is one of the most significant of her entire life, she will be able to recall every detail of the birth of her children into her old age. It is imperative to that you take the time to understand her desires, whatever they may be and come to a decision together for the birth of your child.
I have gathered some resources for you to begin with. I also offer a complimentary consultation appointment – a time for both of you to come and ask any questions you may have about me, home birth and my services. You are welcome to contact me and to ask any questions you may have.
A Dad’s Journey to Homebirth
A short video to help answer the question every dad wants to know: is home birth safe?
A Dad’s Journey Into Homebirth
This is a booklet, please take the time to read it, it is written by the husband of a fellow midwife. It is a quick read I promise!
Husband-Coached Childbirth by Dr. Robert Bradley
Becoming a Father: How to Nurture and Enjoy Your Family by Dr. Willim Sears
A Word to Fathers
by Jill Cohen
When a woman is in her early months of pregnancy, it may be difficult to relate to how much her body and mind are changing. Patience and understanding are key to maintaining good relations. As her belly swells and your baby kicks, you can feel the movement and hear the heartbeat. Now it is easier to relate to what is going on! As the pregnancy evolves and birth becomes more imminent, your woman will lean on you. Her needs and wants will become your guide to how to be. The process is natural. You will also learn what your own role and needs are. With good communication everything falls into place. Mother Nature provides learning tools toward parenting for both of you.
Birth is a woman’s time. The power which her body follows in order to open and let the baby emerge is a primal force of nature. What the birthing woman asks for is what she needs. Even the quietest, shyest women become unabashedly direct during the forces of labor. Your woman will tell you what she wants or doesn’t want. You will be proud of the strength she displays. Your role is to dance along and love her through this magnificent process. Although it may be difficult for you to watch your partner in discomfort, remembering that your baby will arrive soon and that this is a natural and good thing helps to meet the greater goal. Birth becomes not so difficult and in fact is fun! And remember, you are vital to the process.
However, it also is important for you to find what is comfortable for you. How involved you are is your choice. In this culture we have progressed from complete exclusion of men in the birth to demanding their presence. It is between you and your partner to find what works best for you, and there is plenty of middle ground. You and your partner will only be pregnant and birthing a few precious times in this life. Enjoy and cherish these experiences. Fathering a child makes you part of a continuing evolutionary process, involving you in the production not only of your children, but your grandchildren and all generations to come.
Jill Cohen has been a community midwife in Eugene, Oregon for more than 20 years. She has been with Midwifery Today for 14 years, where she is associate editor of Midwifery Today magazine and senior editor of The Birthkit. Click here for more biographical information. © 1987-2001 Midwifery Today, Inc. All Rights Reserved.